Preschool Conflict Resolution Tool: Make a Book about a Conflict with the Child

As anyone who has read Misbehavior is Growth or reads my blog, The Observant Mom, knows, I favor an educative approach with children. Instead of admonishing bad behavior, teach ideal behavior. I also put a heavy emphasis on modeling healthy conflict resolution. This tool of making a book with a child about a conflict that has happened is both–and is long lasting and teaches so much more.

It’s a real simple idea: make a book about something that went wrong and with the final solution. I thought of the idea when my son, around 4 years old, told me books were made at book factories. I wanted to make a book with him to show what an “author” was. What better way to teach that than to do it? It turned out to be so much more. The first question was: what to make a book out of? Well, why not make it something about him. A book where he’s the star! We made a book called “The Boy Who Got a Hair Cut.” It was about how he was scared to get his hair cut but his dad talked to him to find out that the issue was he was worried his ear would get cut. His dad then worked with him to make sure he and his ear felt safe. It was a great book to read over and over again. It reminded him that we would approach him with this kind of love. It reminded us that this is the ideal parents we strive to be. And it was a huge hit when I showed it to grandma, my husband’s mother.

I made one with my daughter as well. I wrote about how you may as well be ready with social lessons when a child turns 4. This book idea is one way of providing an educative social lesson to a child. It’s not so much a lesson to tell them how to behave but to show that when conflicts arise, mom and dad and whoever else will work towards a solution. Then it’s forever memorialized in your book! It can help them learn to read too–what an interesting book to want to read! Here was our book with my daughter about “The Day We Forgot Kitty.”

The Day We Forgot Kitty by Mom
We went to “Let’s Play,” an indoor playground
It was time to go. We forgot kitty!
Emily misses kitty!

When I made the book with my kids, they wanted to make sure certain details were added. Here they wanted to make sure that daddy and Henry were recognized as going with us to rescue Henry. Relationships are so important to them!

We rescued Kitty with dad and Henry
Mom gives Kitty to Emily. Emily is so happy!

Do you know anyone who would love this idea? Please share it with them.

For more educative ideas, find me on Facebook as The Observant Mom and see my book Misbehavior is Growth: An Observant Parent’s Guide to the Toddler Years.

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